Have you ever seen any of these events on TV where a film or music star gets swamped by crowds, and the safest thing to do and easiest way out is to just stand still and smile for photos until things thin out and the handlers can get close enough so he or she can safely slip away? That's kinda what it's like to be my son here in southeast Asia.
The adoring fans, by which I mean Asian women with iPhones and their husbands and family and friends who take the pictures, appear in droves no matter where we go. We're quietly and reverently visiting a temple. One should be quiet and respectful, right? As it happens, this what would happen if the next Buddha arrived, so not to make the comparisons between deities and my boy, but they just can't help themselves. Everyone smiles, points, waves, pinches (gently), touches, and photographs. Some actually get quite aggressive. They pose him like a doll, one pulls him right off my shoulders, and one old lady actually grabs his package as if checking his gender! What do you do about that? Is this normal? No one seemed at all bothered about it. We are left shocked, angered, bewildered by the behavior, and shamed that we didn't say anything, but what do you say? This little old lady just did what she always does, I guess, but our western sensibilities just screamed abuse at us.They take his hand and walk away with him. Where are they going? are they bringing him back? have we inherited a new family? are they going to recompense us for the boy? I kid about the last one, of course. We follow, smiling as though we know no harm is meant, but we can't help but worry a little. We've heard enough and read enough about people who walk off with your lovely, trusting little child. So we try not to overreact, but we are definitely cautious.
Most people are respectful enough to ask if they can take a picture, but of course others see that the beautiful little white boy is allowing pictures, so they want in on the action. Sometimes he stands still and smiles for 10 solid minutes! Have you ever tried to get a 3 year old to do anything for 10 minutes? He really seems to like it. He even expects that people with cameras will want to take his photograph. He walks right over to people and photobombs them. He has his showbiz smile, and his showbiz poses. We can't really describe what it's like. He gets narky when people don't ask him. This almost never happens, of course.
When we went to India, the people still wanted pictures, but the would walk behind him, imitating his voice like they were mocking him, to get his attention they hiss at him, they pinch him hard and are generally not terribly pleasant to him, so we didn't allow a lot of pictures there. I don't know if culturally there are just like that with their children, but there really is a line as far as we are concerned, and we just didn't like how he was treated. In Laos, the people didn't seem quite as immediately friendly, and that confused us. We got so used to Dominic being swarmed everywhere, that it almost felt insulting. It's not the case at all, of course, they are friendly people, and they love children and love Dominic, they just react differently to tourists. I don't know if it's distrust left over from the Vietnam war. The Americans dropped hundreds of thousands of landmines and never bothered to come collect them when the war was over, but their children are still having their legs blown off, if not being killed, trying to salvage UXOs (UneXploded Ordinance) for scrap metal. Lucrative, but exceptionally dangerous.
Back in Thailand, it's business as usual for Dominic. For a little while, he was getting annoyed with all the people and pictures, but he's come back around to liking it, smiling and posing every time someone asks him to take a picture with him. He gets sweeties and toys, souvenirs and little gifts given to him. I guess people want to leave a little piece of themselves with him, as he has kindly given of himself to them. Very kind and very cool, I think. He even has stock poses and things to say. He says hello in the native language and laughs along with them when they squeal with delight at the little boy who says" sawatdee kap" or "minglaba" or "namaste/namaskar". He has them eating out of his hand, and loves it. He knows that they all find joy in him, so he gives them what they want. That's the sign of a great entertainer, understand your audience, and give them what they want. He tells them of his adventures, the flights and boats and trains he's been on, the cities he's been to and the things he's done. Most of the time, their English is limited so they don't understand what he says, but they like his squeaky little boy voice, so they talk back and smile, they ask his name and his age and where he's from, and Dominic tells them. He's gotten quite good at it, and he answers them in the order they are usually asked, even if it's not the actual order the questions are asked.
The long and short of it is that he likes being the star. The focus of every one's attention and affection. I think when we return to England it will be a bit of a shock, he's still a lovely child, but he's in no way unusual. He's a chatty, happy, playful little boy, and he'll always be our rock star.
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